The Start of Something Special

me: i think that starting a blog together would be taking steps towards finding out who Melissa is

Melissa: i know

who is melissa?

i dont even know

she is like the chupacabra

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Melissa: for our blog, u will have to do most of the book segments

me: definitely

u should write about celebrity gossip

u should discuss the implications of the movie Love Happens

(hell freezing over)

Melissa: hahah

or Paper Hearts

(hell freezing over, in an uglier way)

IB Book Club

me: i want to start a book club with you
where we just re-read IB lit
and react to it as adults
Melissa: hahah
omg that is good
of course Song of Solomon would be the first
me: can we skip Night
Melissa: yes
can we skip Grendel
i didnt read it
at all
me: The Stranger
can we read that twice
Melissa: haha YES that was what i was going to say
me: Midaq Alley
Melissa: omg i ordered that movie from amazon
but never got it
i didnt realize that i didnt get it until years later
can we do The Importance of Being Earnest
twice
me: YES
omg
that is my fav
Melissa: omg u know what would be the best
if we had a talk show
and we would discuss the books
and we would dress up for each book


Melissa: for mishima we would get bowl cuts



me: for midaq alley we would wrap ourselves in bandages bc our bones are brittle


Melissa: and for the stranger we would wear sunglasses
cuz we dont want to accidently murder anyone



me: Chronicle of a Death Foretold we would be in priest robes
with bloody hands
and then on the set of our talk show there are random entrail props
Melissa: LOLL omg those entrails


Melissa: for The Tempest we can dress up as Caliban


me: hmm what else
for Grendel we could just wear spaghetti straps
bc our hairy backs are self explanatory
they tell the whole story
Melissa: HAHAH

The Next Big Thing

me: i seriously think we should start a blog about books
or tv
just things
a joint blog about thoughts
Melissa: can we?
cuz my blog is going nowhere
me: your blog needs to file for unemployment
Melissa: haha oh i kno
welfare

Jury Duty

Melissa: have u ever had to do jury duty?
me: nope
Melissa: ur so lucky that uve never been summoned
i dont wanna go
lol
me: i know
Melissa: its tomorrow
im going to eat le peep before i go
cuz i fucking deserve it
me: lol omg yeah u are totally going to le peep beforehand
i wonder what the case will be
Melissa: what if i show up for jury duty and judge judy is the judge
me: omg
best
Melissa: when i do jury duty do i have to discuss with the other jury members to whether he is innocent or not
or is that with just serious cases
me: i dont know
u watch a video i think
Melissa: haha oh with celebs right?
me: lol yes
like corey feldman
Melissa: i remember we watched something like that in american gov class
that is so american
to have celebs in the video
me: oh i know
Melissa: what if it is the next OJ
omg
i would die
i would kill myself right then and there
maybe i will get to be on fox news
and talk about the case
me: LOL
u would get on the Today Show
ann curry would interview you
right after she interviews a boy who lost his hands in a lemonade stand accident
Melissa: omg i hope so
my answer to everything will be 'ur pretty'
me: she is so pretty
omg
i hope that the case u are going to is the trial of michael jackson's doctor
Melissa: HAHA
omg
i know
i would jump out of the building
it is the only thing to do

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Update:

Melissa: omgomg
jury duty got cancelled
best day ever
!!!!

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Update:

Melissa: I am scared they are going to summon me again
it is a looming monster

Priorities

Melissa: omg lol
he is funny
too bad he's fat

To Be Honest

me: i drank arizona pomegranate green tea for lunch
and the cap smells weird
Melissa: its probably ur bad breath

The Breakup

me: i would break up with charlyne yi
ugly
Melissa: so rough
michael cera should go to uc davis
all the asian girls here are way hotter than charlyne